What would you do if...?

I would probably crush all the cars in front of me during traffic. It isn't against the law... is it? XD

What would you do if a grenade flew threw your window and latched itself onto your foot?

I'd cut my foot off with toenail clippers...

WWYDI Santa decided to give people weapons of mass destruction instead of toys?

Use these to my advantage to overthrow and loosely unite the world as we know it, placing me as the sole dictator and king of known Earth. Any opponents would be easily enough... Disposed, of.

Wondering amidst a foggy swamp, you come across a mutant closely resembling that of the bloodsucker (See STALKER Shadow of Chernobyl), armed most obviously with nothing more than a common Utility Knife, what shall you do?

I would sick my pet vampires on him and then take his utility knife for my own devious plans.

What would you do if you were half horse.

I'd be like ''I'm a Centaur! whatcha gonna do foos?!?!'' and then go out and make money by being awesome.

WWYDI you went on a plane trip and had to sit next to two large Albanian women with excruciatingly severe body odor and the little kid in back of me kept throwin' up the whole time, the flight attendants ran out of Dr. Pepper and salted peanuts and the in-flight movie was Bio-Dome with Pauly Shore and, oh yeah, three of the airplane engines burned out and we went into a tailspin and crashed into a hillside and the plane exploded in a giant fireball and everybody died except for you?

Crawl to Albuquerque.

WWYDI you were attacked by Axe Cop?

"Axe cop? What the heck is that?",
and walk away after shooting him in the face with a .50 caliber.

What would you do if...
..you combusted into flame, then froze, and the cycle repeated and you became immortal?

I already I'm immortal for I am a Werewolf, but for the questions sake, I take a spaceship and swim to the next galaxy.

WWYDI: A dog ran around in circles started a black hole and began to suck up the world.

I would watch singing as I am ripped apart.

What would you do if you fell down a cliff and lay at the bottom with a giant boulder on our arm trapping you.

Falling? Whassat?

What would you do if...
...your computer suddenly demanded a fresh install of Windows 95?

I would probably fall off my chair laughing.

What would you do if you were zapped to the French Revolution (1789) and could actually do something to stop the stupidity that would befall France for the next hundred years?

I would turn into a Power Ranger and fight everyone at once with my laser cannon fists.

WWYDI you were trapped on the moon by an evil spacelord?

Blow up the moon, of course. My back would be turned to the explosion as I flew off, so I'd be fine.

WWYDI you were kidnapped by space dinosaurs?

I'd say RAWR.

WWYDI you were grabbed by an alien stabbed through the chest with its tail and the alien walks off not knowing you lived?

I would tear the alien with my bare hands and impale its eyes with beef jerky!!!!

Fail.

WWYDI: A man was naked in your yard dancing.

I'd be like Gran Torino, "Get off my lawn" (while holding shotgun)

WWYDI you lived in shoe and you ain't got no sole?

I would get it shined.

WWYDI it began to rain chunks of burning rock, basket ball-sized hail and unicorns?

I would climb on a unicorn and gallop to the desert where it doesn't rain.

What would you do if you woke up with utters.

I'd probably remove them with a laser.

What would you do if...
...your computer developed a virus that forced your computer to do (insert the worst imaginable thing ever)?