Darian Araleas

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Darian Araleas

Post by Zan105 on Wed Sep 08, 2010 10:38 pm

Name: Darian Araleas

Age: 22

Gender: Male

Appearance: Tall, Black hair, one silver eye and one blue, black long coat, Stealth suit (Or camo) underneath, aviator sunglasses.

Skills:
Long Ranged Weaponry: Darian excels with sniper rifle like weapons with which he can take out enemies silently and precisely.

Throwing Knives: Darian has no short ranged weaponry, instead he carries a plethora of knives along his body hidden in various places. Over the years, using bionics and personal skill, Darian has aquired extreme accuracy and speed with these knives allowing him to be more deadly than most guns. In the current day most men use mechanical shields rather than physical armor, these shields are made to block bullets, not knives.

Stealth: Since Darian doesn't use weapons over the years he has developed an extreme sense of stealth, along with new advancements in camouflage and stealth tech he can make himself nearly untraceable by most.

Weapons:

Long Range Sniper

Throwing knives (Lots of them)

Newest style of camouflage

Other Items:
Commonly carries a kind of communicator

A pack of cigarettes and a lighter

Zipcraft

Ship Name: Leviathan

Appearance:

Attributes: Contradictory to its name the craft is extremely small, holding Darian himself and one of other man if needed, Darian gnerally takes the most of his missions in the Leviathan alone.

The size and shape of this ship allows for extremely quick travel as well as disguise from some radar. The shape of the ship itself reflects the radar sweep, (Much like a B52 Bomber) (I think the new picture should be smooth enough for your likings of this)

Weapons:


Plasma Cannon: Underneath the cockpit is a cylindrical object which contains the Plasma cannon. Although it takes a few moments to charge it is one of the more powerful weapons on the ship.

Wing Mounted Lasers: The ship doesn't have much for lasers but if Darian runs out of ammo he can simply drop two small laser cannons out of the wings and use those.

Missiles: Missiles are the main weapon for the Leviathan. On the inner wings on either side are two pods. Like the lasers they simply drop missiles under the wings which are primed and ready for fire.


Miscellaneous Details:

The ship is slightly thicker on the wing area than the picture, to allow for weapon storage.

The Aerodynamics of this ship allow for intense speed as well as said radar invisibility.

EDIT: Here's my quick fix, I'm headed off to school so it was done pretty fast but i think its still okay, let me know if there's still anything needed to be fixed.

Edit Again: Took out Implants


Last edited by Zan105 on Thu Sep 09, 2010 9:33 pm; edited 3 times in total
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Re: Darian Araleas

Post by Chef on Wed Sep 08, 2010 11:18 pm

Your character looks good for the most part, but I'm going to have to say no the stealth cloaking. It's a little too high tech for what I'm looking for. Otherwise, it looks good on that end.

Now for the ship...

First of all, it's way too big. I'm not sure if I specifically said this (and I'm very sorry if I didn't), but it should be pretty small. We are all going to have these ships docked in the Atlas IV, so it'd have to be a small fighter ship, probably having room for only one or two people and used solely for fighting or travel on planets. I'm very sorry about it, but I'm going to have to ask you to redo the ship so that it's smaller and the stealth cloak will probably have to go.

Also, the melee parts on the ship aren't exactly conventional. In most cases trying to get in close for something like that would get you killed (and I'm not sure if the blades themselves would be durable enough for damage. It'd probably send you ship off course and cause you to crash because of the impact). You can still keep them if you want, I suppose, but I'm not going to guarantee that they will work. In most cases we'll want to shoot an enemy down so we don't have to get so dangerously close.

So, just change the ship and the cloaking system stuff like I said, and your profile will probably work.

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Re: Darian Araleas

Post by John Archer on Thu Sep 09, 2010 12:12 am

Randomly jumping in here, I can safely tell you that the ship would not work as advertised.

Stealth requires a very specific design, one that the design pictured does not have. It has to be very smooth with a minimum of protrusions; anything that breaks the sleek lines will have a radar cross section. Also, everything should be designed with parallel lines; on the F-22A Raptor, for example, the leading edges of the air intake, wing, tail fin and vertical stabilizer are all parallel with five other sets of similar lines. The end result is that any radar beam will only be returned to the transmitter (which would result in detection) if it is in one of six very specific directions from the fighter. The picture, however, shows way too many attachments, most of which seem useless anyway.

It is not particularly aerodynamic. I realize that this RPG does allow flexibility there due to antigravity tech but the design of this thing does not make sense at all.

A "small" ship would never be able to have room for any of the crew space you were talking about. Again referring to the F-22A, it can carry six Slammer air to air missiles, two Sidewinder missiles and a single vulcan gun. It has room for a single pilot, no other crew. Overall length is just under 19 meters. Pic to give you a good idea of just how big that is. Also, considering that the fighter in question doesn't have any actual wide spaces, the dimensions have to scale up to be huge to allow enough room.

Chef hit the right note regarding the melee weapons; they're useless. As stated they would throw you way off target the instant you actually hit something with them. If you don't score a kill with that by the time you recover from the tumble (if you do at all; things like this tend to cause aircraft to fly as well as a rock) you'll already have a missile down your throat. Also, reinforcing the blades well enough to actually survive being used like this would make your fighter way too heavy to fly.

Which end of that ship is the front? I don't see any engines on it.

Anyway done with my engineering rant, couldn't resist. Razz
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Re: Darian Araleas

Post by Zan105 on Thu Sep 09, 2010 8:00 am

Alright my quick fix is done, tried smooth it out a bit, tone it back... Let me know

I scrapped the energy blades but in the defense of them, there would be no course alteration due to hits cause you're not actually using a physical object to slice through something... You are using pure energy.
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Re: Darian Araleas

Post by Chef on Thu Sep 09, 2010 6:04 pm

You're ship looks like it will work quite well, now. Thank you for editing it, it looks very good.

There is one more thing I kind of want you to remove. It's the implants for his arms in legs. Just so your character isn't overpowered, I'm going to have to ask you to remove them, as your character has many other great attributes as well (and some nice weapons). So if you'd remove that, that'd be wonderful.

So once you change that, and if there are no other objections...

[APPROVED]

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Re: Darian Araleas

Post by Zan105 on Thu Sep 09, 2010 9:32 pm

Okay, sounds good...
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